I'm not sure how (or why) I made it through all of these films. Sometimes two hours can feel like an eternity, and each of these films made me regret my wasted time. Avoid at all costs! Here we go, from least terrible to most terrible.
10. Legends of the Fall
After having been promised a classic when I missed it back in the 90s, I was looking forward to an epic story. It was pretty, but not much else.
9. Dream House
The first of several horror films on the list (because it's a genre that attracts young filmmakers and innovation, I think it also attracts a fair share of misses), this film should have a lot going for it given the cast and director. Nope. Stupid and predictable.
8. Oz the Great and Powerful
Despite being from Kansas, I'm not committed to loving all things Oz-related, and this weird little movie was just too much of a mess for me to ever enjoy. I don't think I rated it as lowly as some of the others, but it was a real disappointment.
7. The Dictator
Yikes, Sacha Baron Cohen, what were you thinking. Racism isn't inherently funny.
6. Mimic
Guillermo del Toro had a film on my favorites of 2013, and then he has this abomination that was just an incomprehensible mess.
5. RED 2
The first RED movie was clever and a unique take on the action film--not great, but fun. This one was a self-satisfied and stupid mishmash of old-people-jokes and spinning cars.
4. Now You See Me
CGI is movie magic, but if your film is supposed to be about cool talented magicians, it just gets silly. Watch The Prestige instead.
3. A Haunted House
Parody can be fun. But first it has to be funny. This was neither.
2. The Hangover Part III
These films seem to get worse and worse each time. Maybe you can't recapture old magic. I hope they stop trying with this ensemble.
1. Chillerama
Ugh: unlikable, unfunny, and unwatchable. This movie actively made me angry and unhappy, and I wouldn't wish it on anyone.
Honorable Mention: We're the Millers, The Numbers Station, The Ward, Fast & Furious 6, Scream 4, and Cold Weather.
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